Sw// caps italics
Tw// transphobia
(on some non-English platforms) I found some ppl saying they are (binary) trans themselves, but like to assume and guess the AGABs of nonbinary ppl they met online based on some goddamn-knows-what stereotypes. They usually claim that they are not transphobic. Is this claim even COHERENT?? You know, the base of queer theory is AGAB is a pure bullcrap and a form of institutional violence. It feels worse being judged upon by "fellow" queers.
Context: Many nonbinary friends of mine and I met some ppl in video games and online servers, that after we talked well, they start to bring up personal questions, (cishets don't really think these are personal questions tbh) "are u boy or girl" and even more straightforwardly (and sounds old-fashioned lol) "ASL?"
Then you start to feel the urge to escape
Even if you refuse to answer (bc it's not always good to out yourself to everyone as nonbinary), they still keep that damn curiosity. I think this kind of curiosity is a kind of aggression tbh. Many of them claim that they do not mean to harrass, they have no knowledge about diverse genders.
Even if you out yourself as nonbinary, some ppl still struggles to find your "real gender". Man I have chosen to be honest with you bc my real gender IS nonbinary.
We are not Schrodinger's-Cat boxes yet to be open and the quantum state collapses when opened to give you a satisfying absolute boy/girl answer!!
This rendered a sad fact that nonbinary folks have to choose a persona to pass either online and irl. It's an ill fit of course. But can't we ever get rid of those presumed labels 😑