Alrighty so uhh haha terrifying secret I barely share online: I'm AFAB (terrifying ikr /j). A few years ago I decided to go by the main label of Nonbinary and over time I've tried searching for secondary labels to fill the void that "Nonbinary" doesn't always do.
The most accurate secondary identity I've gone by was probably Genderfluid. My gender switches around a lot and 50% of the time I can't even tell what I'm feeling like. The label of genderfluid has been great for me for a while until recently.
I've started to realize that I feel most confident and comfortable when my fluidity shifts to feeling masculine. Feeling masc has become my favorite gender feeling over time. The only problem is that I don't always feel like a guy and when I don't I tend to get a bit dysphoric.
I'm a bit confused on whether I want to stick with the label of genderfluid or not because even though it's technically accurate I tend to heavily prefer feeling masculine or neutral over feminine.
I still like being feminine, don't get me wrong, but it's more of a guilty pleasure and if I feel it too often the magic of it starts to fade and it becomes a burden.
I've been slightly considering the umbrella term of transmasc but I'm not completely sure. I don't always feel like a guy and I very rarely feel 100% male. Plus since I have a rather androgynous appearance I rarely get dysphoric about my body and I don't think I'd want to transition. I also don't really have anything against being called feminine terms (though I prefer neutral or masc ones and want to change my name) and in general I'm pretty comfortable with my femininity and wouldn't want to lose it.
I don't know it's all so confusing and I'm most likely overthinking it. I'm pretty sure I'll just stick to Nonbinary but I'd like some advice from others too.